I'm writing this just to get it out of my system. I'm not usually one for writing things down. I never get round to it, usually and by the time I do, I've usually forgotten what it was I was going to say...

I just can't sleep right now!
I'm awake again in the middle of the night and I'm trying to think where Djex must have gone or rather, why. I mean, it's pretty obvious she's gone to Skjir's World but why? She knows it's madness here right now. They're in the mining season and the place is crawling with Prosperitan warships and pursuit vessels. And that's not to mention the fucking Starfighters that patrol there regularly to keep an eye out for people like us, in case we raid one of their precious fucking mining ships robbing the place of the terkinum they use to for cheap fuel.

This waiting around is like fucking torture! I want to go out there and find her, but we all know that it's crazy to just take off on some crazy chase! But even so, still part of me would rather just do that and be done with it, and fuck the risks!
However... I'm not that hot-headed. And even Azzogh, the mad bastard that he is, isn't that crazy! To be honest, neither is Djex, which is why we're all so concerned.
I'm sure Azzogh saw me and Djex that time we just randomly started fucking in the ship's gun turret. He obviously loves that girl more than he admits. Vrigon knows and she managed to handle it, even though she and Djex have been more than just friends for a while now. I was surprised how un-jealous she was! She's a good girl, Vrigon. Gotta love her, same as Djex.

I'm not sure what's going on with Azzogh, though. He seems unusually tense and gloomy. He gets like it anyway, but this is particularly bad! All of this makes me think his feelings for Djex haven't been allowed to be shown and now she's gone and done a runner, it seems to have really hit him, bad. And, like I say I reckon he must have seen and heard me and her fucking that time. It was just a random thing, ya know? We'd both been drinking in the relaxing room and went up to look at the stars from the gun turret... and before I knew it she was stripping off and coming onto me! I mean, what would anyone do if someone like Djex Raenraat Slaavruhl comes onto them? I just let nature take its course. I thought I heard a noise of movement nearby when she was riding me in that seat. I was so into the moment that it didn't sink it at first, and she didn't seem bothered anyway even if she did notice! She was going crazy on my cock, groaning and I was loving it, if I'm honest. Well, who wouldn't? I felt weird when we finished, though. Not because me and Djex are good friends! She's not the kinda girl to waste time being embarrassed over things like that with. No, it was that noise I'd heard while we were in the throws of passion. I'm sure it was Azzogh, disturbed by the noises! He hasn't mentioned it, though. Not even now! I'll see if I can approach the subject one of these days. If he's jealous then he has no right to be! He knows what she's like and he's as bad, himself, the fucking charmer! But his feelings for that girl are obvious enough. I'll see how it goes and maybe make sure he's okay. We've been friends a long time, me and Azzogh, and I'm not letting a random act of drunken passion get in the way of that. It didn't fuck things up with me and Djex and we even said we'll probably do it again. So I ain't falling out with my old friend Azzogh. And neither will Djex, so he's got no reason to be pissed off. But I suppose feelings ain't always reasonable, so I'll cut him some slack for now. I'm just wondering if all the stress is making things worse. And if she is in trouble, then he'll be wishing he'd opened up to her more, I guess.

Anyway, I'm going to try and get some more sleep. I need a fucking drink of something to help me sleep! I just don't want any more nightmares. I've had too many over the years since that fucking war and I'm trying to avoid them now, too! The drugs built into my implants only work so far. I'll try a drink of something nice to help me sleep more peacefully.

Signing out now.
Startime 4 hours, 18 minutes.